“Life is a perfect adventure; a game that cannot be won or lost, only played” – Unknown
Would you rather win, lose, or play?
Really think about this for a second. I think that our default response is to say that I would like to win. Why even play if I’m not going to win? And I definitely don’t want to lose.
I would argue that winning and losing represents a very limited, black-or-white way of looking at life.
Also, what does it even mean to win or lose? Ask yourself that as it applies to the game of life. What does it mean for you to win? What does it mean for you to lose?
Winning for me was actually defined as not losing. Rather than designing the life of my dreams, I was often steered by a desire to avoid the life of my nightmares.
Losing meant loss of things: My house, my family, my things, and even the respect of my peers or my family. Winning meant avoiding that nightmare and keeping those things.
By that definition, I was winning.
Years went by and I started to question the whole game. I came to realize that it wasn’t my definition of winning that was flawed, but rather the fact that I was trying to win at all.
So I took winning and losing off the table.
When we do this, what we’re left with is a game whose sole purpose is simply to be played, as the quote above suggests.
We’re also left with a much more interesting question:
What and how do we choose to play?
This is a powerful question because it forces us to search for answers within, rather than relying on the default and inherited scripts that have been externally imposed on us.
For me personally, playing the game means:
– Defining my own role and my own meaning
– Looking for creative ways to engage with and help others
– Hearing what’s being said but not spoken
– Enjoying the thrill of taking risks, enjoying the payoffs, and learning from what doesn’t work
Most importantly, I’ve come to realize that it can be very hard to enjoy a game that you don’t want to play. The beauty of it is that we have choice and control in our game of life. Whether it’s your career, a relationship, or a habit, you get to choose what you play and how you play it.
If it feels like the world has stuck you into a game that you didn’t choose, that you’re solely focused on winning or that you’re at the mercy of rules that you didn’t define, just know that this is very normal. It’s a feeling that we’ve all experienced in one area of life or another.
I’m passionate about helping you take back that control so that you can get back to playing, and having fun doing it.
Easily book a free discovery session with me using the list below!
https://calendly.com/meet-mike-mendez